Tips to Help Someone with Depression
Life can be hard. Sometimes life experiences, periods of significant change and adjustment, or even certain times of year may contribute to depressive symptoms for some people. Experiencing symptoms of depression may be a completely new experience for some, while for others, depression may recur throughout their life.
Symptoms of depression can vary from person-to-person and may include:
A consistently low, blue mood
Lack of interest in previously enjoyed activities
Difficulty getting out of bed or completing daily tasks
A general disinterest
Fatigue or lethargy
Avoidance of friends and family
Difficulty concentrating and procrastination
Difficulty functioning well at work or in other areas of life
Thoughts of self-harm
It can be painful to see a friend or family member experience symptoms of depression. We may wonder, “how can I help someone with depression?”
Consider these tips:
1. Reach Out
Depression can feel isolating. People may be believing unhelpful things about themselves, and could feel as though their circumstances will not ever change. It may be hard for someone with depression to receive an offer for help. They may avoid others because they do not feel up to interacting or because they don’t want to ‘burden’ others with their concerns. Yet, a foundational way to support someone with depression may be to reach out.
We may reach out by texting, phoning, video conferencing, mailing a card, or visiting.
We may follow that up with an offer to help in some way. For example, rather than saying, “tell me if you need anything” we might say, “I cooked you a meal and will leave it on your doorstep if you aren’t up for company today.”
When reaching out, it may be helpful to consider ways that this person might feel most able to spend time. For example, maybe meeting in their backyard for coffee feels more doable than going out for dinner with a group of people.
remember
It may be helpful when reaching out to remember to be patient and to not necessarily take someone’s reaction to your efforts personally. Everyone is likely doing the best they can.
2. Mindfully Listen
When, and if, your loved one is ready to share about their experience, it can be beneficial to practice mindful listening. Mindful listening asks us to listen openly, without judgment, and with curiosity. Rather than listening with the intent to respond, we aim to listen with the intent to hear and understand the other person. Beyond mindful listening, it may be helpful to ask someone what type of support they need or want.
For example, support may look like:
Emotional support - such as when we want to be heard, validated, and felt understood.
Pragmatic support - such as when we need help with a daily task or responsibility (like running errands or cleaning).
Informational support - such as when we want someone’s advice or help finding the right resource. *If this is the type of support someone wants, that’s great! However, if it isn’t - that might be extra good to know because we don't tend to love getting advice that we didn’t ask for!
remember
Beyond mindful listening, it may be helpful to ask someone what type of support they need or want.
3. Resources
It can be overwhelming to seek help or find the right resources when you’re feeling depressed. Not knowing where to start or what to look for in an organization or provider may be obstacles to getting needed support. Consider two different types of resources that may be beneficial to explore with a loved one:
*Community or peer-based resources, such as these general ideas:
Community clubs (e.g., YMCA) or special interest groups in the neighborhood (e.g., skateboarding meet-up)
Volunteering for a meaningful cause (e.g., animal shelter or a beach clean-up)
Group exercise or forms of movement with others (e.g., yoga studio; walking group)
*Professional resources may include:
Support groups
Individual therapy
Group therapy
In the event of an emergency, emergency resources can include phoning 911, presenting to the nearest emergency room, or phoning the National Suicide Prevention Hotline.
Remember
When helping others, it is important to remember to care for ourselves too. This may include using effective communication skills to assert boundaries, engaging in self-care, and offering ourselves compassion. It may also include using professional resources, such as support groups or individual therapy.
Grow True Psychology is not a referral for emergencies. Please do not contact Grow True Psychology if you or someone you know is experiencing an emergency. In the event of an emergency, please call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.
Disclaimer: Please note that visiting this website does not constitute a doctor-client therapeutic relationship. The information and resources included or linked on this website are for informational purposes only and are not intended to assess, diagnose, or treat any medical and/or mental health disease or condition. The information obtained from this site should not be considered a substitute for a thorough medical and/or mental health evaluation by an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional. We do not know the specifics of your situation or have the facts to provide this type of evaluation and recommend that you seek an appropriately credentialed and licensed professional to establish a doctor-client therapeutic relationship. This website also includes links to other websites for informational and reference purposes only. This website does not endorse, warrant or guarantee the products, services or information described or offered at these other websites.
